The Big Game…

Summer is here and now the students are hanging out outside again. It wasn’t long ago that our video game room was packed and people were lining up waiting for there turn in Halo. Now basketball, football, and ultimate Frisbee are the in free time activity. I love playing outdoor sports despite the need for 600 mg of Advil the next day.

When it comes to competition, I suppose I’m not a typical athlete. I don’t really care about winning or losing. Don’t get me wrong I love to win… but I don’t get mad and stuff if I don’t. This is not the case with many of the students and even many of our leaders. They have something to prove; we have professional scouts coming to our property on a weekly basis (definite lie there).

Here are a few basic suggestions for your next big game…

Try to provide two of every sport. Have one for the athletes who love the thrill of competition and who want to win badly. Have another court/field for people who want to goof off and learn the game.

Choose the typical last student first. When it is time to choose teams and the students line up have the captains pick the students that look straight down at the ground, the ones who usually get picked last. They love it.

Ensure everyone touches the ball/disc. During our games we typically have an every other possession approach in which we alternating trying to score and trying to involve. We typically say things like “all touch” meaning that before we score everyone has to possess the ball/disc.

Create heroes. There is nothing like watching the most shy and timid student score some points. They might as well have caught the winning touch down at the Super Bowl. Make these moments come true for as many students as possible.

Remember you’re old now. You don’t have to be the best. It’s not worth the pain the next day. Take it easy on yourself.

The Evangasmack

Proverbs 12
1 Whoever loves discipline loves knowledge,
but he who hates correction is stupid.

When was the last time you “got smacked?”

Last week at our Staff Lunch we all got a good lashing on the topic of evangelism. The smack didn’t come in a verbal assault delivered by our Senior Pastor but in one simple question presented by him. How many people in the last year have you brought to Christ from outside of the church? This question was difficult for me because I had to report a goose egg, A BIG FAT 0!

The way the question was asked took away the conversations I was able to be a part of as a result of students bringing friends to the ministry. I couldn’t count the conversations I had with adult visitors of the church. I simply couldn’t count the conversions that resulted in other people doing the hard part of getting people to church in the first place.

Understand that this question wasn’t asked in a competitive nature. We don’t have a big score card posted in our staff office with check marks next to our names for all the conversions we’ve been a part of (But man that could be a sweet deal! Instead of check marks we could do crosses! AWESOME!). Instead, it was a way to communicate “speed of the leader, speed of the team.” If we expect our volunteers and other attendees of our church to bring others to Jesus, then we need to be sure that we are able to communicate our own stories of doing so. We need to be able to share rejection stories of the times people weren’t interested in hearing the message and to be able to share all the joys and pains associated with being an evangelist.

So what are your conversion stats looking like? Any crosses next to your name? Do you remember what it feels like to meet a neighbor, build a relationship, and share the message of Christ? Do you remember the passion that occurred when a friend met God for the first time? I look forward to hearing your future stories and being motivated to do the same!

Welcome to Disney

Welcome to Disney,

Okay so the impossible happened… I am now a Disney fan. After spending a week there, I now think it is an awesome place to vacation. I have been one of those bah humbug Disney kinda guys until now. A few years ago I went as a guest as some friends and thought the location was great, but I never could understand why people were wowed by silly characters. My wife in particular loves the little winged demon called Tinkerbelle. Although it will be years before I cover my body in mouse ear parafanalia, I certainly have an appreciation for Disneyworld.

While there I went on a “Keys to the Kingdom Tour.” http://disneyworld.disney.go.com/wdw/parks/tourDetail?id=KeystotheKingdomTourPage&bhcp=1

On the tour you are given some “insider” information. It’s the kind of stuff that if I told you, I would probably get my blog shut down. Okay, that’s a whole lotta dramatization. Truthfully, it would be a whole lotta typing.

Many of the things revealed on the tour are worthy of discussion but here is something that I would encourage you to reflect on. While on the tour they told us the four keys to the kingdom. Our guide explained that they are the keys to a door with four locks. She continued, “If one key is missing then the door does not open, symbolizing a less than “magical” Disney experience.”

The four keys were simple… not a list of 10 or 15 but a simple list of four:

• Safety – the number one priority of the day
• Courtesy – all cast members (employees) must treat every visitor as a guest and be hospitable
• Show – every aspect must be tied together to build a theme
• Efficient – the park must run smoothly
  

I would suggest doing an inventory of your ministry on those four simple things. As a church we must always question our spiritual direction, as a church, we must always keep the other four in check to pursue excellence.

Graduation Event

What are you doing to recognize your seniors for graduation? Over the years we have done a variety of things to give these students the props they deserve. Here is a short list of ideas that perhaps you can utilize.

– Personalized Elements – Ask all the seniors to contribute all their favorite personal pics and songs and have them loop in the beginning of the service. You could also create a “Know the Seniors Quiz” including questions about favorite quotes, best memories, etc.

– Have someone write a letter to them – Every graduating student is honored by someone reading a letter about them. The student can choose anyone they wish. Typically it’s a parent, but there have been many ministry leaders, teachers, and even fellow students chosen for the letter writing. There won’t be a dry eye in the place!

– Make it a banquet – Allow the seniors to invite guests, serve awesome desserts (or even a meal), and bring a little formality to the event. We seat people at round tables and spice up the room with decorations.

– Give meaningful gifts - Give them something they will keep for the duration. I’ve went to Five Below and bought little items to utilize in an object style lesson, but for the past two years I’ve kept it simple. Every senior receives a Bible (This year it is the TNIV College Edition – see resource list) with a personal message from me written on a blank cover page and a devotional of some sort. Hopefully with a message inside they’ll never get rid of it J

– Give them a gift from everyone – Give other students and adult leaders the opportunity to write all the seniors a message. You can simply put up a piece of poster board up at the event or like my friend Tony in MD, you can purchase a blank journal from the dollar store have these books available for an entire month at youth group.

– Pray for your seniors – Gather your seniors in a huddle and send them off in prayer.

Hope you have a great event!

Summer Heat…Evaluating Dress-Code

Last weekend was a scorcher! It was nice to have a day full of sunshine and heat (especially after several weekends of unseasonably cool temperatures)! Just like your favorite four legged friend sheds as summer approaches, it seems that some of the students that attend our youth group do the same.

We have an interesting demographic at our church because approximately 50% of our students come to our youth group without the support of their parents and without any church background. We have always followed a distraction policy. Unless a student is “hanging out” or wearing something see-through we do not comment initially. Our hope is that the student will get to the place where they develop relationships with other students, adult volunteers, and ultimately God. I am convinced that through those relationships life change will happen and the dress issue will take care of itself.

I sent this issue out to some youth ministers via email. Check out some of their responses…

- Aaron Thomas - "Well, it’s 85 in January out here and the West Coast is…let’s say, a little more liberal in their dress. I have quite a diverse crowd at youth, about 40% churched students and 60% very unchurched (which is my target audience). If I see a churched girl dressed like a hooker, I’m going to tell her that. However, unchurched students should “come as they are” and once I feel there is a trust and connection there, I (with a female leader present) will address her clothing."

– Tim Schmoyer - "Personally, I require that girls wear one-piece bathing suits or wear a non-white shirt on top of a two-piece suit. Other than that, it's kinda like an ambiguous distraction policy. If it's distracting to me or someone else by diverting attention away from the point of the meeting (like, a Bible study or something), then it's addressed. I'm not really a fan of legalistic "skirts no shorter than 6 inches above the knees" sorta rules.

However, unchurched students are a different story. I like Aaron's response. It's a good principle to follow, depending on how far you allow the "come as they are" thing to go. There are some lines that just must be drawn even for unchurched kids. Like, is a bra-less girl wearing a see-through t-shirt acceptable? I think I'd address that one right away even if she's straight off the street. It's not too much to expect students to follow certain rules. That's just a part of life: school has rules, families have them, even driving on the roads have rules. I want to create an environment where students' attention is drawn to the Lord, so if someone's inappropriate dress or behavior is severely hindering that, I'm going to address it. There's a difference between criticizing someone's dress and criticizing them personally. I think most students can tell the difference."

So... What do you think?

Closing Shop

How do you handle the ministry shutdown at the end of the evening?

Do you simply kick everyone out at a set time and it’s over? Every ministry, regardless of size and scale of programming, has to deal with the shutdown process. Maybe you deal with some of the same issues that I have. No one is passionate about cleaning up, everyone wants to be a relational superstar during the clean-up time period, the same people seem to be doing all the work and then complain about it.

I’m a firm believer that despite the program shutting down some of the best ministry happens during the time frame after the "program" has finished. About a year ago our High School Ministry met in our church office because our main services were in a movie theater. We basically had one large room full of couches, video games, AV equipment etc. Our program was from 7:30 till 9:00 and students could hang out as long as they desired up until their driving curfew. It amazed me how many students didn’t leave until 10:00, 10:30, up until 10:45. During this time frame leaders had the ability to connect with students at a deep level. They were able to pray for students and challenge the students’ relationships with God. The great thing about that office is that you could clean the entire meeting area in 15 minutes with only one or two people.

Over the summer of 06 we left the movie theater and built our first building. This greatly enhanced our ability to connect with students as we are able to offer more “stuff” for them to get involved with as well as create a higher level of ministry programming. The down side is that it would take one or two people an hour and a half to clean it all up on their own. I didn’t want to discourage the hangout time that we once had at the office but many leaders are understandably ready to leave at 10:00 in order to prepare for a long work week.

We have adopted a strategy over the past couple of months that seems to be working well for us. Maybe this will help you and perhaps you can contribute something that works well for you!

Here’s the timeline of our ministry:
4:30-6:00 Set-up
6:00-7:00 Middle School Hang Out Time
7:00-8:00 Combined Teaching for Middle School and High School
8:00-9:00 High School Hang Out Time

At 9:00, just like the old days many people are not ready to leave. Just like the old days, this is still awesome relational time! Not wanting to waste that time, we put the following timeline into practice.

9:15-9:30 Evening Recap. Four of us (myself, our arts leader, a volunteer Administrative Assistant, and a volunteer Volunteer Coordinator) get together at this time to recap the evening. We discuss every detail including set-up, the programming elements, and the hang out time. From that meeting each of us gets a task list that we will work on the following week. This meeting is great because it is weekly! We are able to recap both positive (things to keep doing) and negative (things to improve) elements. Everyone else is free to do as they please. Some people begin the clean-up process while others continue to be solely relational.

9:30-9:45 At this time we call all remaining leaders and students to come together into the large room to do a recap. At this time I ask basic questions such as “What was the God moment for you tonight?” “What was a meaningful conversation that you had with a student?” “Who interacted with (new student)?" “What is God doing in your life now?” This is also the time I share a short training tip and we pray for one another.

9:45- 10:00/10:15 This is the time we initiate the clean up sequence. It is at this time I thank everyone for being a part of the ministry and say goodnight to those that are exhausted. This goodbye time is key because I never want leaders to feel bad for leaving, they have been there for hours already! Those that remain are given direction on cleaning up. It is a beautiful thing to see students and leaders unite to accomplish a common goal, leaving ASAP to grab a bite to eat!

10:00/10:15 Optional time to eat and hangout. Although I rarely “feel” like going out after such a long day it is a lot of fun and culminates huge relational payback. We either go to Applebee’s (half price appetizers) or McDonalds. Just like the old days, we kick students out at driving curfew.

12:00 Go to sleep!

Monday – Vegetation and recovery!

I will close with these two questions:
How often do you and your volunteers get together to review the services?
Do people want to leave as soon as your programming is over or do you have to kick them out?

If Only

Need… What a funny concept. What do we really NEED? What do we NEED to have an awesome youth ministry? What do we NEED to have a great marriage? What do we NEED to have fulfillment in life? Beneath every NEED there is the potential of an excuse lurking below the surface. You can identify this with the “if only” statements. If only we had more staff. If only we had committed volunteers. If only my spouse understood me. If only Rita’s Water Ice was fat free.

This week I was at the PCTC (Pennsylvania Christian Teen Convention) planning session for 2008 and we were invited to attend an “optional” prayer meeting from 9:30 to 10:00. Truth being told, I had been doing a lot of praying that day. Tuesday was the day Ben, our Student Ministry Arts Intern, was going to give his decision as to whether he was going to come on full time or not. I had also been praying for friends of mine who have been going through a terrible situation. I honestly didn’t want to go to that room, but inside I knew I needed to be a part of that moment.

As I sat down to pray I felt restless so I decided to read the book of Philippians. When I came to Philippians 4 I was struck by verse 6 in the NLT. Don’t worry about anything, instead pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done. It continues… If you do this, you will experience God’s peace, which is far more wonderful than the human mind can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus. It was then I came face to face with the question, “What do I really NEED?” I decided to go before the Creator of the Universe and tell Him what I NEEDED. It radically changed my prayer. I found myself saying I think I NEED. It was easy to thank Him for all He has done. This simple exercise brought me peace and strengthened my faith.

NOW WHAT?
1. Create a list of the things that you think you NEED?
2. Pray through that list saying, “God I NEED…”
3. Spend time thanking God for what He has done.